“Like a Prayer” was the first from Madonna’s 4th studio album, Like a Prayer. It was released on February 28, 1989.

After my parent’s 50th wedding anniversary, I received another letter from Thaddeus. This time, he invited me to visit him in Seattle. He had just bought a new home and needed help painting a couple of bedrooms. I had never been to Seattle and wanted to see Thaddeus, so we planned a trip for the following November. I was very nervous about seeing him, but at the same time, I was ready to get out of North Carolina. I needed a break.

“I hear your voice; it’s like an angel sighing, I have no choice, I hear your voice, Feels like flying, I close my eyes, oh God I think I’m falling, Out of the sky, I close my eyes, Heaven help me.”

I became very nervous when my plane landed at Seattle–Tacoma International Airport. I didn’t know what to expect. As I got my luggage out of the overhead bin and walked towards the front of the plane, my stomach gathered in knots. I saw Thaddeus standing there when I walked around the corner and out of the gate. I almost didn’t recognize him. I pretended his appearance didn’t affect me, but I was devastated. I hugged him and started talking about my flight and how much flying scared me, especially the cross-country flights.

That weekend, Thaddeus and I spent our time touring Seattle. We painted one of his bedrooms and watched movies on his new VHS tape player. Several times throughout the day, Thaddeus had to lie down. It was primarily due to the latest drug he was taking, AZT. At one point during my visit, we went to his clinic to get his prescription filled, and I was horrified when I walked in and saw all of the AIDS patients. Each one looked like a warrior and soldier brought in to fight a new war.

During my trip, I told Thaddeus about Titus and that I had dated a man outside my race. Thaddeus commented, saying, “Well, maybe if I were black, you’d still have feelings for me!” I didn’t say anything because I knew what he was trying to say. Thaddeus was very lonely and scared. It broke my heart to see him this way. I wasn’t sure how to comfort him or even if I could. I just sat and held space and hugged him.

Thaddeus’ family was Catholic, and he told me that they never accepted his homosexuality, much less his sickness, so he had a tough time with it. Thaddeus was powerful spiritually, so I knew he would be okay on that level. I wanted to stay with him for a few more days but had to return to my parents in North Carolina.

I felt as though this would be the last time I would see Thaddeus; however, I would see him one more time.

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LIKE A PRAYER

Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone
I hear you call my name
And it feels like home

When you call my name it’s like a little prayer
I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there

I hear your voice, it’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes, oh God I think I’m falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me

Like a child you whisper softly to me
You’re in control just like a child
Now I’m dancing
It’s like a dream, no end and no beginning
You’re here with me, it’s like a dream
Let the choir sing

Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery
Just like a dream, you are not what you seem
Just like a prayer, no choice your voice can take me there

Just like a prayer, I’ll take you there
It’s like a dream to me