Lucky Star was the first track from the album titled Madonna.
There is a sliding scale when it comes to sexuality. On one end of the scale, a person is one hundred percent straight, and on the other end, a person is one hundred percent gay. The points vary according to one’s interests, desires, and curiosity. I knew my place on that sliding scale when I was probably four. I was completely gay.
I spent most of my childhood and adolescent years hiding the fact that I was attracted to the same sex. I grew up in a small, southern town where most gay people were called queers and faggots, and bullied on a regular basis. Most families shared the same feelings toward gay people, so it was no wonder that I kept that part of myself hidden away.
I knew I couldn’t change, though. My sexuality was very personal and overwhelming. I was also a very religious person. My faith led me to believe that being gay would send my soul straight to hell for all of eternity. That was a terrifying reality for me.
After my introduction to the gay bar and other gay people, I slowly began admitting to myself that I was indeed a homosexual. But I never acted on it. One day, in my early twenties, I sat in the woods near my house and had a serious conversation with my God. I told him or her that I was a homosexual, and I knew that very soon I was going to act on it. I extended an invitation to God and asked God to do me a favor. I wanted him or her to take my life before I did anything that would jeopardize my chances of going to heaven. Just like every other religious person, my goal was to get to heaven, and I didn’t want anything to get in the way of that, especially my sexuality.
At this point, I felt my life begin to change.
“And when I’m lost, you’ll be my guide I just turn around and you’re by my side. You must be my lucky star ’cause you shine on me wherever you are.”
Shortly after my conversation with God, things started to move in a different direction. A person who was very important to me stopped me in my tracks one morning and asked me if I was gay. She had found out that I was gay through one of my nephew’s friends. (That’s another story altogether.) She promised me that nothing would happen to me if I told the truth, and I knew then that my life had come to a crossroads.
If I said I wasn’t gay, then I would have to live a life of lies and deception. If I told her I was gay, I would have to go through the humiliation of others knowing. I already knew how the important people in my life felt about gay people. Right then and there, I admitted that I was gay, and I have never denied it since. From that point in my life, my sexuality foreshadowed every other part of my personality. I told myself that I wasn’t going to be ashamed. I didn’t want to be ashamed of something I had no control over. I knew that if anyone ever detected shame, they would use it against me.
From that moment on, I trusted that God (my Lucky Star) would be with me and guide me in the right direction.
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LUCKY STAR
You must be my Lucky Star
‘Cause you shine on me wherever you are
I just think of you and I start to glow
And I need your light
And baby you know
Chorus:
Starlight, starbright first star I see tonight
Starlight, [starbright] make everything all right
Starlight, starbright first star I see tonight
Starlight, [starbright] yeah
You must be my Lucky Star
‘Cause you make the darkness seem so far
And when I’m lost you’ll be my guide
I just turn around and you’re by my side
(chorus)
Come on shine your heavenly body tonight
‘Cause I know you’re gonna make everything all right
You may be my lucky star
But I’m the luckiest by far
(chorus)
Come on shine your heavenly body tonight
‘Cause u know your gonna make everything all right
(2x)
Your may be my lucky star
But im the luckiest by far